7 songs to play at your next party (If you hate everyone there).


Every generation has their own version of the “Teen Movie”. From Animal House to Superbad every film aimed at the youth always has one thing in common, the huge house party. The setup is usually the same, the parents are out of town, the fake ID secures the booze, and inevitably the house ends up completely destroyed because teenagers are awful people. The only thing worse than a party hosted by someone who is worried about their parents carpet; Is going to a party in your 20’s. So the next time someone tries to convince you that Brad’s “kickback” is going to be sick go ahead and show up at the fiesta, take over the Aux cord, and jam out to this mix tape that will either make people shake their asses off or call an uber while worrying about your mental well being. You’re welcome.


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For a lesson in how to make 26 minutes feel like 7 hours at the DMV, try this one-track masterpiece. ASMR was popular on YouTube channels in the year leading up to the pandemic and then everyone got bored and watched a documentary about a guy who may or may not have had a sexual relationship with a tiger. We aren’t sure which is worse but this track is a surefire way to clear out any room.


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Long before the infamous Tate Murders Charlie was just like you and I, a simple ex con with a shitty guitar and very little money. Before settling into the groovy Los Angeles music scene Manson had already spent about half of his life incarcerated. Once out, he dreamed of being a rockstar while partying with The Beach Boys, and Neil Young. Unfortunately for Chuck, his musical lifestyle never came to fruition and well, we all know the rest of his terrible story. ‘Look at your game, girl’ may very well be the origin story to his horrors in the same sense that Hitler used to doodle Mickey Mouse before becoming the biggest butthole of all time. I can already imagine the looks you’ll get from someone when you throw this banger on.


Before you start shitting all over Tim and his tiny fiddle you should know a few things. First, this man absolutely took himself, and his angelic falsetto voice, very seriously. After his fans stopped coming to his shows, Timmy moved to Vegas and began playing any gig he could including cafe’s and side rooms in dusty old bars. Later in life, while on tour playing his jams for dozens of people in towns nobody knows Tiny Tim suffered a heart attack on stage, bringing the tour to an early end. Months later while belting out the same hit, Mr. Tim suffered yet another heart attack that proved to be fatal. Kill the vibe at any function with this song that is sure to be a summertime HIT.



Born in the later half of the fifties in New York, Gary Wilson paints a vivid soundscape of experimental music with his use of synth keyboards. If you’ve ever wanted to know what a bad acid trip sounds like this is it. After being name checked in Beck’s early single, “What I got”, Gary found a newfound fame with insane people that probably have conversations with birds. Some people say it sounds like Alvin & The Chipmunks after taking oxycontin but to us it sounds exactly like the musical equivalent of a birds fucking.


This is a perfect example of music done right. Willis doesn’t worry about arranging his songs or even the content of his lyrics, he just sits down at a Casio keyboard and lets his emotions soar. If the music industry isn’t rigged then explain why most of you have never heard this historic song before? We’ll wait.


In the 70’s Calentano stated that Italy was so infatuated with American culture that he could put out a song in "English" that was actually complete gibberish and people would still love it. Well, Adriano did just that and after watching his nonsense song catapult to the top of the charts in his homeland, Calentano would go on to be one of Italy’s most revered musical acts. We’re not sure how difficult it is to read if you suffer from dyslexia but this may be the audio equivalent of what they go through.


Spotify says that almost three thousand people stream his album titled “Noise Experiments” each month and we are willing to bet that if you pulled this IP addresses and sent a cop over to “check things out” these people would be arrested immediately. We don’t like to label things-or people, but this song makes me want to take a cold shower and wash my ears with bleach.

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